Sovereignty & Devotion Go Hand in Hand
A Non-Dual Approach to Teaching Anything, and Especially Yoga and Tantra
A warped architecture of relating to authority can take root early in a person, because of the historical abuses of parents and other adults in power toward the child (especially fathers and sons), and cause resistance to learning anything at all. Without sovereignty, we can’t relax into receiving teachings, we have to be armored. The teacher-student relationship in spiritual traditions has long been marked by questions of authority, power, and transformation. I'm in a deep in a reimagining of this relationship, to honor transmission while preserving the inner authority and sovereignty of all, and also allowing for deep receiving and surrender. The tantric approach to the teacher-student relationship offers a mature alternative to both hierarchical guru worship and the rejection of spiritual mentorship altogether. It recognizes that transmission is real, that guidance has value, that some have walked further along the path and can offer support, while also insisting that sovereignty, direct experience, and inner authority must be primary and respected. It is also worth revisiting this prior post on the purpose of the Sangha, which speaks to the lateral web of holding each other’s development.
Please note also that in this essay, I quote my friend and teacher, Mark Whitwell. We did an episode together which you may enjoy. There’s also mention of the modern initiator, Patrick Connor, who can be heard in dialogue here.
— XO, CMM
Beyond Hierarchy
The traditional guru-disciple relationship has often been characterized by hierarchical structures where, as one teacher observes, “teachers tell you what to do, what to believe, what to think, and you’re supposed to respect them” with “the whole hierarchical overlay of capitalism.” This model positions the teacher as the exclusive possessor of wisdom and the student as an empty vessel waiting to be filled.
The tantric approach offers a radical alternative. In this tradition, the teacher maintains “no more than a friend, no less than a friend.” This is not a diminishment of the teacher’s role but rather a recognition of the inherent divinity and wisdom within each person. This understanding comes from the Shaivist Tantra concept of recognition, which teaches that each individual is already Shiva, already divine, merely forgetting their true nature. The Śiva Sūtras state that consciousness is the self, the very nature of one’s being.
“The point of yoga is to realize that you are already in relationship with the infinite. The teacher can only point to this; they cannot give it to you because you already have it.” - Mark Whitwell
Teaching or Transmission?
To understand this non-hierarchical relationship, it’s helpful to distinguish between teaching, and transmission: distinct but interconnected modes of spiritual education.
Teaching as Intellectual Transfer
Teaching involves the communication of concepts, practices, and frameworks. It operates primarily through language and operates at the level of narratives and stories. While it is very valuable, teaching alone cannot create the deep transformation that spiritual practice seeks to catalyze.
Teaching in Tantra includes a Redirect to the Self
The Vijñāna Bhairava Tantra, one of the most practical tantric texts, emphasizes direct experience over conceptual understanding. While it offers 112 meditation techniques, the underlying teaching is that Reality is accessed through immediate experience rather than intellectual comprehension. The guru’s role is to point toward this direct experience, not to be an intermediary between the student and the Divine.
The Spanda Kārikā, a foundational text of Kashmir Shaivism, teaches that consciousness (spanda) vibrates equally in all beings, in both guru and disciple. This understanding eliminates the notion that the guru possesses something the student lacks. Both are expressions of the same divine consciousness; the guru has simply recognized this more fully and can help the student to the same recognition.
I say to my students: “you are also God”, meaning that they inherently possess divine wisdom and have things to teach me and each other, too. This approach creates what might be called a fractal learning environment, where everyone is learning from each other all the time through shared direct experience. A teacher offers what they have learned while honoring the student’s direct perception, creating a non-hierarchical dynamic where one can honor completely and deeply, while also trusting one’s own sovereignty at all times. A good teacher will point the student back to themselves, to an inquiry into possible distortions of perception, but the answer comes from the self of the student, their own awakening, awareness and readiness
Transmission as Energetic Reality
Transmission operates on an entirely different level. As the contemporary initiator Patrick Connor explains it, much of our conditioning (and our deconditioning) is perceived non-verbally. It’s not narratives and stories. It’s a pre-verbal transmission field that we are soaking in. I think of this as a field where people absorb energetic patterns from their environment beyond the reach of words or concepts.
This understanding aligns with the tantric concept of śaktipāta (descent of grace), which the Tantrāloka of Abhinavagupta describes as occurring in various intensities, from the most intense to the gradual. Importantly, Abhinavagupta emphasizes that this transmission often occurs through the guru’s mere presence and glance, operating on an energetic rather than discursive level.
This understanding of transmission recognizes that we are constantly broadcasting and receiving energetic information.
Our healthy and whole parts radiate wellness. Our unhealed parts remain in silent transmission until we heal them. All of our frequencies continuously radiate into our relationships and life experience. The teacher’s role, then, is not primarily to convey information but to embody and inhabit qualities of consciousness that students can attune to.
The Kulārṇava Tantra speaks to this: “As a mirror reflects the face, so does the disciple reflect the guru. The guru is the root, the disciple is the fruit.” To me, this suggests an energetic resonance rather than a hierarchical imposition.
The teacher’s presence itself becomes the teaching. The transmission happens through vibrational coherence and presence as a state of being rather than a technique or methodology.
Transmission as Unconditional Love
At its core, authentic transmission carries the frequency of unconditional love. I experienced the core transmission of unconditional love when meeting my teacher, noting how he could see me and notice everything that was really up and going on in me, but not make any of the less palatable aspects wrong. This unconditional acceptance created a field of safety within which it is safe to look at unhealed things and from which my own wisdom can emerge.
The Quality of Giving: Overflow Versus Strategy
A crucial distinction emerges around how the teacher offers themselves and their wisdom. The giving that proceeds from the strategy to invoke getting something back has a different frequency than the giving which comes from overflow.
When giving flows from overflow, it transmits wholeness, and so it then gets carried back to us as wholeness. This giving doesn’t seek anything in return; it emerges from a sense of abundance and completion. In contrast, strategic giving comes from lack, comes from scarcity and creates a transmission of neediness.
This principle finds its roots in the yogic understanding of pūrṇatva (fullness or completeness). The Īśa Upaniṣad begins with the famous invocation: “Om pūrṇam adaḥ pūrṇam idam pūrṇāt pūrṇam udacyate”, or “That is whole, this is whole; from wholeness, wholeness emerges.” When the teacher operates from this recognition of inherent wholeness, their giving naturally flows from overflow rather than lack.
Mark Whitwell emphasizes this principle in his teaching about relationship. He writes: “The yoga is given, not taken. It is received as the given reality of life... not something we must effort toward or achieve.” This understanding fundamentally shifts the quality of transmission from strategic acquisition to receptive recognition.
This principle applies directly to the teacher-student relationship. A teacher who seeks validation, devotion, or completion through their students transmits their incompleteness. A teacher who offers from genuine overflow transmits wholeness, allowing students to discover their own completeness rather than becoming dependent on the teacher’s approval or presence.
The Student’s Readiness and the Magnetic Pull
One of the most significant departures from traditional hierarchical models is the understanding of how teacher and student come together. Rather than teachers recruiting or selecting students, the tantric tradition recognizes that you only call a guru or a teacher to you when your soul is ready. They don’t come to you.
This reverses the dynamic entirely. As the saying goes, “when the student is ready, the teacher appears”, not because the teacher is seeking students, but because it’s the soul longing that energetically pulls the teacher to them, rather than any external recruitment or coercion.
This ancient principle appears throughout yogic literature. The Kula Tantra states: “The guru does not seek the disciple; the disciple’s ripeness calls forth the guru.” Similarly, the Guru Gītā emphasizes that the meeting of guru and disciple is orchestrated by divine will rather than human manipulation: “When the Lord is pleased, one attains a true guru.”
Mark Whitwell articulates this in contemporary language: “The teacher is only a temporary phase of learning how to be your own authority in intimacy with Life itself.” This understanding protects both parties. The student is not approached before they are ready, and the teacher is not seeking to fill their own needs through acquiring followers. The relationship emerges organically from genuine readiness rather than from marketing, persuasion, or the teacher’s need for validation.
Sovereignty Within Devotion: The Both/And of Spiritual Relationship
Perhaps the most delicate and important aspect of the tantric teacher-student relationship is the maintenance of sovereignty within devotion. This is not an either/or proposition but a both/and reality.
I honor my teacher completely and deeply in every way. I bow down to him, and I also trust my own sovereignty at all times. Deep respect, even devotion, need not compromise personal authority. The bowing is genuine, the honor is complete, yet there is no abdication of self-trust. In fact, true devotion is not possible without sovereignty: otherwise it is co-dependence.
This stance requires a mature understanding of what devotion actually means.
Devotion is not obedience or the surrender of discernment. Rather, it is a recognition of the sacred in another while maintaining recognition of the sacred in oneself. It is possible to be profoundly influenced by a teacher, to receive their transmission, to honor their wisdom, and still to validate one’s own direct experience as the ultimate authority.
The Śiva Sūtras state: “Svātantrya-śaktir-mahesvarī” (The power of absolute freedom is the great Goddess). This sovereignty (svātantrya) is not something to be surrendered but the very nature of consciousness itself. A guru who asks for the surrender of sovereignty is asking for the surrender of the divine nature itself.
Mark Whitwell is particularly emphatic about this principle. He writes: “No one needs to be fixed. Everyone is already whole and complete... The teacher who makes you dependent is not a teacher but an abuser.” His work consistently emphasizes that the guru’s role is to point the student back to their own inner authority, not to replace it.
Direct Experience Over External Authority
This brings us to perhaps the most fundamental principle of the tantric approach: the primacy of direct experience. I consistently tell my students: “Don’t believe anything, feel it. Know it from the inside. Have the direct experience in your body, with no authority figure other than you.”
This instruction might seem to contradict the very existence of a teacher. If the student’s direct experience is the ultimate authority, what role does the teacher play?
The answer lies in understanding the teacher as a guide to direct experience rather than a replacement for it.
The Vijñāna Bhairava Tantra is entirely structured around this principle. Rather than presenting dogma or theology, it offers 112 techniques for direct experience, each introduced with the instruction to practice and verify for oneself. The text implicitly recognizes that conceptual understanding is not the same as realized knowledge (jñāna).
The Yoga Sūtras of Patañjali distinguish between different types of knowledge: śruta (heard knowledge from texts and teachers), anumāna (inferential knowledge), and pratyakṣa (direct perception).
Direct perception is considered the most reliable and transformative. The guru’s role is to facilitate this direct perception, not to substitute for it.
The teacher’s role is to create conditions where direct experience can occur, to point toward possibilities the student might not otherwise consider, to hold space for transformation, and to offer their own experience as data rather than dogma. The teacher says, in effect: “This is what I have discovered. Try it yourself. See what you find.”
This approach prevents the spiritual bypassing that can occur when students accept teachings intellectually without embodied realization. It also prevents the dependency that develops when students substitute the teacher’s authority for their own inner knowing.
Mark Whitwell emphasizes this repeatedly: “Yoga is not about belief. It is about direct participation in the actual conditions of life and the inherent power that sustains you.” Mark consistently directs students toward their own felt experience as the ultimate teacher.
Mutual Learning: The Fractal Nature of Wisdom
The non-hierarchical tantric approach recognizes that wisdom doesn’t flow in only one direction. In this tradition, everyone is learning from each other all the time. Since each person is recognized as divine, students have things to teach the teacher as well.
This creates a learning environment where insights can emerge from any participant. The teacher may have more experience or a broader perspective, but they don’t have a monopoly on wisdom. Students bring their own unique perspectives, life experiences, and direct realizations. The entire community becomes a field of mutual awakening.
The concept of sat-saṅga (true community or association with truth) in yogic philosophy supports this understanding. The Bhagavad Gītā speaks of how wisdom can emerge through dialogue and mutual inquiry. The guru is not separate from the community but an integral part of a field of collective awakening.
This fractal quality, where each part contains and reflects the whole, honors the democratic nature of consciousness itself. Everyone has access to the same source of wisdom; the differences are in clarity, embodiment, and integration rather than in fundamental access to truth.
In Kashmir Shaivism, this is expressed through the concept of pratibimba-vāda (the doctrine of reflection), which teaches that the entire universe is a reflection of consciousness, and each being contains the whole within themselves. The guru and disciple are both complete reflections of the divine, at different stages of recognizing this truth.
Transmission in Community and Relationships
The understanding of transmission extends beyond the one-on-one teacher-student relationship into community and all relationships. Our unhealed parts and relational patterns are constantly being transmitted into our life experience. This understanding dissolves the separation between individual and collective transformation.
Each person’s journey toward wholeness contributes to collective healing. The teacher’s work is not to fix or save students but to support them in doing the work that will naturally radiate outward, impacting all those they encounter.
While this principle is contemporary in its articulation, the underlying understanding is ancient. The Yoga Vāsiṣṭha teaches that individual consciousness and universal consciousness are not separate—what transforms in the individual ripples through the whole. The tantric understanding of spanda (vibration) similarly suggests that all consciousness is interconnected and mutually influencing.
Mark Whitwell writes: “Your practice is not for yourself alone. It is for everyone and everything. When you nurture life in yourself, you nurture all of life.” This understanding motivates practice not from self-improvement but from recognition of interconnection.
Protection from Power Abuses
The principles outlined here offer significant protection against the power abuses that have plagued spiritual communities.
The teacher who embodies these principles has no interest in creating dependence, no need for the student’s devotion to fill their own emptiness, and no claim to authority that supersedes the student’s inner knowing.
The student who understands these principles can honor and learn from the teacher while maintaining clear boundaries and self-trust.
This doesn’t mean that challenges won’t arise. Transference, projection, and unconscious patterns will still emerge in any intimate relationship, including spiritual ones. But the framework itself doesn’t enable or encourage these patterns; rather, it provides a context for becoming conscious of them.
The Kulārṇava Tantra contains specific warnings about false gurus who use their position for personal gain, sexual exploitation, or ego aggrandizement. The tradition has always recognized the potential for corruption and has established principles to protect against it.
Mark Whitwell has been particularly vocal about abuses in yoga communities. He writes: “The guru who demands celibacy while secretly having affairs, who requires obedience while living hypocritically, who creates dependency while claiming liberation…this is not a guru but a predator.” He consistently calls for accountability, transparency, and the centering of the student’s wellbeing.
Teachers Must Continually Deepen Their Own Work
Since transmission happens through presence and frequency rather than through technique or information transfer. The teacher doesn’t transmit by trying to transmit but by being what they are inviting students to become. The Spanda Kārikā teaches that when one abides in spanda (the vibration of consciousness), this naturally awakens spanda in others. The guru’s realization creates a field that makes realization more accessible to those in proximity through resonance.
Transmission operates through vibrational coherence and presence rather than just words. The teacher who has done the work of healing their own unhealed parts, who gives from genuine overflow, who embodies unconditional love, naturally radiates these qualities. Students who are ready to receive will attune to this frequency and begin to resonate with it themselves.
The Śiva Sūtras state: “Yogī svātma-viṣaya-pratyayī” (The yogi experiences their own Self as the object of awareness). When the teacher abides in this recognition, their very presence becomes an invitation to the same recognition in others.
This is why the teacher’s inner work is never complete. The teacher must continually deepen their own realization, light their own shadows, and expand their capacity to love unconditionally without bypassing their own human experience. The teaching flows from the being, not from accumulated knowledge or refined techniques.
The teacher must be a living demonstration of what they teach. The practice must work in their own life before they can authentically share it. This insistence on embodied realization rather than conceptual understanding is essential to authentic transmission.
The Role of the Teacher in Tantric Traditions
Offering Direct Transmission
The teacher offers what is called Śaktipāta in the tantric tradition—direct transmission of energy and awakened consciousness. This is not something the teacher possesses and bestows, but rather a quality of being that the teacher embodies and which students can attune to. The transmission happens through resonance rather than transfer.
Abhinavagupta describes in the Tantrāloka how śaktipāta can occur through the guru’s touch, glance, word, or even thought. Importantly, he emphasizes that this is not the guru’s personal power but rather the natural flow of Śakti (divine creative energy) when conditions are right, including when the student is receptive.
Seeing the Student Transparently
The teacher’s role includes seeing the student’s soul transparently without any judgment, only unconditional love. This unconditional seeing creates a protectorate of love, or a field of acceptance within which the student feels safe enough to explore and release what needs to be released.
The Kulārṇava Tantra speaks of the guru as one who removes darkness, not through imposing light but through revealing the light already present. This seeing is not diagnostic or judgmental but recognitional, the guru sees through the student’s conditioning to their essential nature.
Helping Clear Energetic Frequencies
The teacher can support students in clearing energetic patterns that block liberation. However, this happens through invitation and support rather than through control or imposition. The teacher creates conditions; the student does the work.
The Śiva Sūtras teach: “Udyamo bhairavaḥ” (The arising [of knowledge] is Bhairava/Shiva). This emphasizes that awakening is an arising from within, not an imposition from without. The guru facilitates this arising but does not control it.
Modeling Embodied Wisdom
Perhaps most importantly, the teacher demonstrates what it looks like to live from the principles being taught. The teacher’s life becomes the teaching. The Guru Gītā states: “The guru is Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva—the creator, sustainer, and transformer.” The true guru embodies the complete cycle of spiritual life, demonstrating not just abstract principles but lived reality.
A New Paradigm for Consciousness
This approach holds the tension between devotion and autonomy, between receiving and discovering, between honoring the teacher and trusting oneself. It requires both teacher and student to show up with integrity, clarity, and a commitment to truth over comfort or convenience.
When both teacher and student recognize themselves and each other as divine, the relationship becomes one of mutual recognition rather than hierarchical positioning. The teacher bows to the divine in the student; the student bows to the divine in the teacher. And both bow to the truth that reveals itself through their sincere engagement.
The transmission that occurs in such a field a mutual attunement to something that transcends both: a field of consciousness, love, and wholeness that each person can access directly. The teacher’s role is to create conditions where this direct access becomes more likely, more conscious, and more integrated.
The Īśa Upaniṣad teaches: “Tena tyaktena bhuñjīthāḥ” (By renunciation, enjoy). The guru who renounces ownership of the teaching, who renounces the need for followers, who renounces the ego’s claim to spiritual authority creates the conditions for genuine transmission and genuine freedom.
“Don’t believe anything, feel it.”
In the end, the most profound teaching is this: Trust your direct experience. Honor your sovereignty. And know that you can do this while also honoring teachers deeply, learning from others continuously, and participating in the fractal field of mutual awakening. This is the sacred dance of sovereignty and devotion—both fully present, neither diminished, each enabling the other to more completely flower.
